Category: work
Happy Weekend!
If I work out today and tomorrow, I will have kept my promise to myself to work out all seven days this week! Thanks again to my husband for pushing me to work out on Monday. Ah, I guess I’ll keep that quirky fellow around 🙂
This has been the longest Friday in the history of all Fridays. I’m just ready to head home and get this weekend started. The little, loud people (a/k/a my stepkids) will be arriving this evening, and it feels like longer than a week since I’ve seen them.
I’m curious about tomorrow’s weigh-in. I tentatively have exercise back under control, but my eating habits, though improved, can still use quite an overhaul. We will see tomorrow morning how it all plays out on the scale.
Just a few minutes ago, my boss came into my office and shut the door. That’s never good, right? I wracked my brain for whatever I had done wrong. I was not late to work, I had everything done on time, I hadn’t used my outdoor voice in the hallways…what could possibly be up?
Turns out, I’ve been offered a pretty sweet opportunity, out of the blue. I can’t get into much detail right now because I haven’t even told my husband yet. I want to wait until I get home. I want to share it with him in person, not just send him a text.
It’s nice to head home with good news to kick off the weekend!
One Pound a Week
February 1st already! January was such a hectic month, I blinked and it was gone.
I came to the realization yesterday that I just have too much going on to devote the energy and time to weight loss that I thought I could. Setting weekly goals, or vowing to reach goal weight by a certain date, is just adding more strain and piling on more responsibility that I don’t want or need.
I have so much dumped on me at work right now, it’s positively absurd. My to-do list runs onto a second sheet of paper every day. I am interrupted constantly, and I am astounded at the random things my co-workers ask for my assistance with, everything from an error message on the copy machine to someone’s computer freezing to someone not being able to log into e-mail. A co-worker once told me that happens because I seem to know what I am doing, but how that translates into me being a copy machine technician or an IT expert, I have no idea. All I know is, it gets frustrating when I am incessantly interrupted from things I really need to get done.
Today I wrapped up a major project I’ve been chipping away at for weeks, so I am taking a small break to catch up on my blog and read some others. So…hi!
By the time I leave work, I don’t have the mental or physical energy or motivation to do much else. My husband and my stepson are great with keeping up with chores around the house, so I usually come home to the trash already taken out, floor swept, dinner started. It’s wonderful. But I am wound so tight from being keyed up, in a rush, and under pressure all day long, I don’t know how to unwind once I get home.
So the last few days, my workouts have slid off my evening to-do list. I know I am not doing myself any favors. I need those workouts right now more than ever, for my health and my weight loss and my well-being. But just the thought of trying to fit in a workout set my nerves on edge, and facing one more obligation makes me snarl, bare my claws, and roar “Bite me!” I realized I was chafing under the idea of another deadline, another item on my task list, something else to measure and evaluate and track…
It doesn’t need to be that way. I am removing all expectations of running a half-marathon anytime soon, or any other deadline-focused goals. It just can’t happen right now. I am burning the candle at a million ends, and there isn’t enough of me left to worry about one more damn thing. That is just how it is.
So no more “x pounds a week” goals, or pressure on myself to run a certain number of miles, or reach a certain weight by a certain date. I have one goal for myself: aim for one pound a week. That’s it. I need to cut myself some slack for now.
My fresh, new, blank workout log for February is ready to go, waiting for me to log some workouts. They don’t need to be power-lifting, Olympic-training, all-out workouts. I just need to get moving, a little something each day. I need to make the time for that, and I need to consider it a gift to myself, not just one more thing to get done.
*Cough, Cough*
It’s official: I’m one sick puppy! My husband finally urged, prodded, hinted (maybe even lovingly nagged just a wee bit) until I gave in and reluctantly went to see my doctor. A chest x-ray ruled out pneumonia, but she still prescribed some horse pills, roughly the size of a small baby, that I am expected to swallow despite a raw, sore throat.
Alas, she said I am not terribly contagious unless someone drinks from the same glass as me, something we don’t tend to do at work, so I am back at the office today, bright and chipper…well, okay, I am here, anyway.
I have been skipping weigh-in because, quite frankly, any weight loss efforts have been non-existent. I haven’t worked out in about a week because I can’t breathe, and just walking up the stairs at work leaves me winded, since I can’t get enough air into my lungs.
I need to just start over. Yes, again! How many new starts does it take to lose this weight? As many as it takes, I suppose. I weighed in this morning, have my new number, and just need to move forward from here.
I’m not healthy enough to leap back into workouts yet, but soon. And I will have to take it slow when I get back at it. I treated myself and ordered a Leslie Sansone walking DVD today. She can be a little annoying (“Walk! Walk! Walk!”), but you can’t beat her positive attitude or easy, gentle workouts when you are starting over again. I would know, because I have started over a million times!
My Future Marine
Today I was forced, against my will, to attend a work event. I can’t stand social events for work. Chit chat, mingling, networking…I hate all of that crap. A meal was served during the program, and I didn’t know ahead of time what it was, so I knew it was going to be a high-risk situation. If I pack my lunch, I have total control over what food is even available to me. An event where food is served? Not so much.
Luckily the meal itself wasn’t terribly tempting. It looked and tasted like it had been sitting a while before it hit my table. I picked at the chicken and ate a few pieces of grilled squash. I didn’t like anything else. Cooked carrots and most other vegetables are just oozy slime to me.
During the entire meal, though, a delectable, tantalizing slice of cheesecake posed seductively before me, topped with whipped cream, calling my name like a brazen temptress. Have I mentioned that I absolutely adore cheesecake? All I’ve wanted to do all week is eat, eat, eat, and now this!
Before I knew it, I picked up my spoon and grabbed a small bite. I had hoped it would taste terrible, but no such luck. It was amazing. I have been resisting temptation all week. Didn’t I deserve a little treat?
Maybe, but I still put the spoon down and firmly told myself “no more”. I don’t need the Weight Watchers points or the calories (18 Weight Watchers points and 400 calories in one slice, in case you were wondering). I was honest and logged my one bite, and I was relieved I didn’t have to log the entire slice!
You may have noticed that I re-launched the My Marine Boot Camp Challenge on the right side of my blog. When I was struggling so much, a challenge was just another burden and stressor. It wasn’t helping or motivating me at all. Now that I feel like I’m ready to move forward, I decided it was time to get back to my challenge.
My stepson had an injury not long after arriving at boot camp, so he hasn’t been in a regular platoon until now. So, if I am understanding correctly, his 12 weeks start now, not when he left last month. We miss him a lot, but maybe focusing on this challenge and accomplishing some personal weight loss and fitness goals will make the time he’s gone go by a little faster.
So, starting now, consider me in boot camp too (albeit a much easier version that what he is enduring). Here’s to me being a lot stronger, fitter, slimmer, and lighter before my future Marine sees me again.
Sweat & Sparkle 