life – Sweat & Sparkle

Everything

I had a lot of plans for my blog after the new year: a recap of last year, goals for this year, catching everyone up on my little world. But my workplace has had other plans for me.

I am known at work for being very detail-oriented, thorough, reliable. Great, right? Well, sure, until the number of people who depend on me, ask me questions, and send me documents to review became a bit overwhelming.

Yesterday I stayed late to finish reviewing a 60+ page budget for someone else in my department. I stared at numbers, followed table rows, and corrected adding errors until I was damn near cross-eyed. Meanwhile, my own work sat, untouched, because I was interrupted all day long with questions and requests for help. I am flattered that I am considered so reliable and helpful, but I really need a breather and time to handle my own work, too.

I want to think a bit about how to make this blog serve me best this year: how to use it more for accountability, for just getting thoughts out of my head, for recording snippets of my life. I haven’t had much time to ponder that since coming back to work, but it’s churning in the back of my head.

Today is officially one full week into the new year already. I know I can’t make time slow down, but I want to take some time each day to really focus on what is happening around me, from the scattering of clouds in the sky to the feel of the breeze as I sit outside at night, to a new bud on one of our roses, to the sound of my husband laughing at something I said, the way his eyes shine when he is happy, all of it…the small things that are actually everything to me.

Love is Life

I agree, wholeheartedly. Love is everything. Without it, honestly, what do you really have?

Time

Today I bought a 2026 calendar. Let that sink in for a moment. Over half of this year is gone already. Heck, we’re almost halfway through July now! It just doesn’t seem real that I have started buying planners and calendars for 2026 already.

I read somewhere that time seems to go by faster as we get older because we have less novel experiences and more routine lives, and each year represents a smaller fraction of our total life. The “less novel experiences” part got to me. I can’t do much about the day-to-day responsibilities of going to work, cleaning the house, taking out the trash, or folding laundry, but reading that inspired me to throw some color, pizzazz, and newness into our lives whenever I can.

Too many times, my husband and I talk about trying something new or going somewhere we’ve never been, and it typically ends with “someday” and no real plan. I want to start changing that. Why wait? What’s wrong with now?

I’m not talking elaborate trips or bizarre experiences here, since both of us admittedly really like being at home, and there’s something to be said for peace and quiet. I’m just talking little new experiences that can build memories for us, give us new experiences to try together, or allow us to simply slow down and appreciate the moments we already have.

Story

I have posted here and there about the difficulties I had after my mom died a few years ago. It was like I ran straight into a massive, sticky spider web, got woefully tangled, and simply couldn’t fight my way out of it.

What I haven’t written about yet is finally, FINALLY, pulling myself out of that web and slowly getting back onto my feet.

I’m still not quite where I would like to be, but I am getting closer, day by day. And after feeling all but hopeless and almost giving up on myself, it’s a triumph simply to be moving forward again instead of sinking further down.

I know that blogging is a dying art, but it occurred to me that sharing more of my story might actually help someone struggling with the same things. So once I figure out how to put some of this into words, I will be back to do just that.

In a few months, I hope to share a major personal victory. It will help put it into perspective to frame it with the struggles and internal warfare I battled through to get there. Until then, I take each day as it comes, put it the work and the effort required to create change, and I appreciate being here another day to see where this day takes me.