I was ready to chew on my own arm after last week, temptation around every corner, wanting to eat, eat, eat, but sticking to my guns paid off. I weighed in Saturday morning at 167.0, and I am officially 50 pounds down!
I am thrilled. I have been working very hard, and it’s great to see the results on the scale. On Friday morning, my fiance teased me about the jeans I was wearing to work, and he told me it’s time to buy a smaller size. I hate spending money on clothes (at least until I reach my goal weight), but I found the next size down on sale for $11, SCORE! I went ahead and bought two pairs in one more size down from there. They don’t fit right now, but they will.
On Saturday, I was supposed to receive my wedding dress, but the package was delayed. I didn’t realize the post office still does some Sunday package delivery, and it arrived yesterday. Good thing I ordered two sizes, because if clothing companies could have some consistency in women’s sizes across brands, it would be a flippin’ miracle! The smaller size wouldn’t even zip. The bigger size slipped on easily enough, and I couldn’t tell if I couldn’t zip up the whole way because it was too snug or if it was because the zipper got stuck where the material got thicker in the back of the dress, where the decorations and details are.
Either way, I was so disappointed, I nearly cried. I have been waiting so long to see how I look in this dress, and I guess I built it up in my head to some Cinderella princess moment, and I just didn’t like it. I ended up losing my marbles and deciding I just look like a fat hog in the dress, that I look heavy, that losing 50 pounds didn’t even matter, that I hate it, that the whole world may as well come crashing to a fiery end, blah blah blah.
Yes, I overreacted a bit. The dress is quite pretty. I know I am not at my goal weight yet, and I don’t look thin yet, but I need to try it on again now that I am calmer and don’t have sparkly dust in my eyes and huge expectations that can’t possibly be met.
Just in case, I flexed my credit card muscles today and ordered three more options, all in two sizes so that hopefully one fits okay and makes me happy. I will return all of the ones that don’t work. I just want to be happy with how I look and feel pretty for the wedding.
Four more weeks to go. I aim to lose at least 8 more pounds by then and hit the 150’s. Even if it’s 159.9, I will be ecstatic with that.
Sweat & Sparkle 