Month: April 2015

Back to Zero

You may have noticed that my weight loss ticker has gone from one measly pound to zero.  Big fat zero. *sigh*  Let me explain.

Last week was a lot of eating out, at work and also with my boyfriend, and eating out is a huge trigger for me.  I know there are salads on the menu.  I know there are things like vegetables and grilled chicken and fish.  But who the hell wants that when there are things like hamburgers and french fries that are so much more appealing?

I had a gain this past Saturday, my weigh-in day, and I was tempted to not update my weight ticker, but I want to keep it honest.  Though to be completely honest, my weight loss is now technically in the negative numbers.  I reset my starting weight and am back at square one.

This week is going to be challenging too.  I work two jobs, and I was just asked to work a third night this week.  That makes three 13+ hour days in a row.  How am I supposed to work out or sleep or even think straight?  Ugh.  Not looking forward to it, but I need to plan and get through it.  I need to quit using my crazy work schedule as an excuse to eat crap.  It shows on the scale, and on my butt, loud and clear!

The Next Seven Days

It’s amazing how fleeting motivation can be.  Just a few days ago, I felt energized, revving to go, eager to track my activity points on Weight Watchers, and I bought fruit and vegetables so my food tracker looked more impressive. Today? Whatever, blah, ho-hum.

How does it leave so fast?  And why?  It would be great to have those answers, but bottom line, whether I feel motivated or not, I need to just do it.  Track.  Exercise.  Drink water.

Problem is, I let myself get overwhelmed with the big picture.  I can track points and work out…today!  But then I realize I need to do this tomorrow.  And the next day.  And for days, weeks, months after that, because I have so much weight to lose.  That’s when I feel overwhelmed, and that’s when I start to doubt myself, start to think I can’t keep this up for that long, so why bother?

At a safe one to two pounds a week, it is going to take me most of the rest of this year to lose this weight and reach my goal.  That feels like an eternity.  That is a very long time of analyzing everything I eat and making myself work out when I don’t want to and avoiding eating out because it’s such a trap and a trigger for me.  May as well quit, give up, eat whatever I want, and just forget about it, right?

NO!  I know better.  That’s a stupid way to think.  It’s what was tumbling around in my mind this morning as I got ready for work, though, and suddenly I had what seemed like such a simple idea that just might work: I will focus on one week at at time.  I will focus on nothing but the next seven days. I will set a goal for that week and refuse to look farther than that until I reach that goal.  Then I will move onto the next week.  And I will do that for as many weeks as it takes to reach my goal.

I love charts, tables, lists, etc., so I created a chart with the date for each Saturday from now until the end of the year on it.  I filled in my starting weight, then filled in a goal weight for each week, all the way down to my goal.  Each week, I will focus on doing what I need to do for the next seven days to lose that pound or two pounds.  Then I will move onto the next one.  If I don’t hit that goal one week, then I just need to step it up and work harder the next week.

I can’t put in the work only on days when I feel like it.  I need to make each day count.

Workout: Done!

Being awake before the sun is even up is painful. Being not only awake, but perched on a Spinning bike and pedaling for all I’m worth, sounds crazy but was actually a great way to start the day.  I love my instructor (it helps that she shares my taste in oldies rock ‘n roll), and class flew by. My workout for the day is checked off the list.

I got lazy with tracking my Weight Watchers points yesterday.  Seeing as how I only re-joined about a week or two ago, that’s not good!  It’s a little early to be konking out.  Back at it today and tracking everything.

My New Blog (Again!)

If the third time is a charm, then the millionth time should be exquisite.  Here I am, starting yet another new blog, but a new start is always good, right?

I have the dubious honor of being the victim of a stalker for the past nine years.  My stalker is the jealous, and obsessed ex of my long-time boyfriend, and she simply can’t stand that he has found true happiness with me.  I imagine part of her obsession is comparing herself to me and desperately trying to identify where she fell short.  (A little hint: there are too many ways to even count!)

I joke about it, but it’s disturbing, really.  Nine years of following someone around is quite sad and shows quite a bit of desperation, sadness, and mental instability.  I have started other blogs, but by the powers of the Internet, Google, and way too much time on her hands, my stalker devours each one.  It is pathetic and also annoying: can I please go somewhere without that rabid bitch humping my leg?

Enough about that crap, though.  I am here because I have about 70 pounds to lose, and I have tried and failed several times already.  Blogging has been a great way to get support, vent, organize my thoughts, and track my progress.

I know I can do this if I really try.  I have a great support system, a gym membership, a boyfriend who supports me and loves me no matter what, an impressive stash of workout DVD’s at home, and the desire to get this done.  Enough chit chat!  Let’s do this!

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